I was reading on what forgiving a person means, on how I can truly forgive and move on. Why would you do this you ask? Because, I have more often been the one to ask for forgives, growing up my life has sometimes become riddled in events which have put me in a place were other people have been hurt by my actions. This was not a bad thing entirely, asking for forgiveness, was something that once I got the hang of, I understood what the true implications of it is and furthermore to do sincerely, to look at your own actions and feel remorse, to have that drive to get up and ask for a second chance.To know that while I may have hurt other people, I had good intentions, although these don't always pan out. To then look at someone in the eyes, and say, I am sorry. Once I understood this, I began thinking more about how to prevent having to be in this situation and went through making amends to truly treasuring that second chance you are given. To be given a second chance is a beautiful thing. This also set a mark for future relationships, where I am aware that we are human and I could hurt someone. Ironically, once I learned the importance of an apology, I needed to make to make less of them. Carefully treating people with love and commitment. Then yesterday night, after a difficult conversation, I heard the words, I am sorry and it was for me. This was strangely unexpected, the word sorry spread through my body like fire and tears rushed to my eyes, I was at the other end of the spectrum this time, and for the first time in my life, I felt the pain of an apology. I am sorry, I was wrong, it was selfish of me. Words that echoed in me, still do, now as I write this. My eyes, feel like a damp holding a big gush of water, I want to scream and shout. But I am not angry, the apology swept the anger away. An apology has made the suffering real, what I felt, was real. Sorry is a companion during a difficult time, something you can hold on to.
The words you were not expecting
The pain you thought you had to
deal with alone
Measures you took
Decisions you made
Made you
You chose who to be
To be free from the place where you thought you were trapped
When who you were made no sense
When you were so alone
Alone with your thoughts
And your pain and love
You struggled with yourself
your years, your life
why?
You asked to the world.
Why did this happen?
How did we get here?
Then
Sorry, you heard
One night, in darkens
You heard the pain in voice
The desire for change
For a chance to once more
Make things right again
sorry
And you knew it was real
You knew it was true
You knew that the things you
believed had happened for sure
And here was you token
In one only word
Sorry.
